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Charlie Bennett

04 Sunday Aug 2013

Posted by Terry in Player Pages

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Charlie Bennett (1878-1893)

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The Vent Test for Hall of Fame Candidates

THE VENT TEST FOR POSITION PLAYERS

1. Career basic – Where do this player’s raw numbers generally rank him among position players?

a. Top 20
b. In the top 50
c. In the top 150
d. In the top 300
e. In the top 1000
f. In the jailhouse now

2. Career metric – According most established metrics, where does this player rank historically?

a. In the top 20
b. In the top 50
c. In the top 150
d. In the top 300
e. In the top 1000
f. In the Navy

3. Peak much - At his highest clearly established level, he was?

a. The best player in the game
b. A perennial MVP contender
c. A perennial MVP candidate
d. A perennial all-star
e. A quality regular player
f. An angel flying too close to the ground

4. Prime many – During his prime, which grade best describes him?

a. He was screwed out a few MVP awards
b. He could have won a few MVP awards
c. He could have won a couple of MVP awards
d. He could have won an MVP award
e. He could have contended for an MVP award
f. He got free two-day shipping

5. Position (contemporary) – Compared to his positional peers, he was viewed ...

a. As clearly the best
b. As arguably the best
c. As a consistent all-star
d. As an occasional all-star
e. As average or better
f. Through tinted Plexiglas windows

6 Position (historic) – At his position, where does he rank historically?

a. He was the best ever
b. He was arguably on his position’s Mt. Rushmore
c. He was arguably in a positional Last Supper painting (roughly 12-16)
d. He was arguably in the positional top 40
e. He was arguably in the positional top 100
f. He was just seventeen, and you know what I mean

7. Comps – How did he - or his best historical comps - fare in Hall of Fame voting?

a. They were elected immediately if not sooner
b. They were elected quickly, first few years on the BBWAA ballot
c. They were elected by the BBWAA
d. They were elected by the Veterans’ Committee, or they were a frequent candidate
e. They were mentioned by someone, somewhere, somehow
f. They were sitting on the dock of the bay, watching the time roll away

8. Exposure – What would this player have to do to make the news?

a. Throw out his garbage (he is news, no action needed)
b. Throw out a runner (anything nominally interesting will be enough)
c. Throw out his wife (anything newsworthy)
d. Throw out his back (anything baseball newsworthy)
e. Throw up on Bob Costas (do something newsworthy to someone we actually care about)
f. Throw rocks at the White House (get arrested, or get caught with a Kardashian)

9. Impact – If Babe Ruth deserves an entire long chapter and the average player deserves a single mention in a baseball history book, how long would it take to list and explain this player's accomplishments, and his contributions to the game's history and its lore? What would this player deserve?

a. A chapter
b. A chapter section
c. A page
d. A paragraph
e. A sentence
f. A ten percent discount on the paperback when it comes out

10. Relevance - If this player is not considered to be qualified for the Hall of Fame, it would mean that the Hall of Fame is:

A- Pointless
B- Deluded
C- Exclusive
D- Behind
E- Discerning
F- In Cooperstown, New York

Conclusion (add ‘em up and divide by 10):

When he arrives at the Hall of Fame entrance, the doorman will send him to the:

A- Penthouse
B- VIP suite
C- Gallery
D- Lobby
E- Line
F- Ticket window

**********************************

THE VENT TEST FOR PITCHERS

1. Based on popular career metrics, this pitcher ranks among the:

A- Top 7
B- Top 20
C- Top 40
D- Top 100
E- Top 200
F- Teeming masses, yearning to be relevant

2. Based on the back of his baseball card, this player’s career fits in the:

A- Top 20
B- Top 50
C- Top 100
D- Top 250
E- Top 500
F- Glove compartment

3. Based on popular metrics, his peak was:

A- Top 7
B- Top 20
C- Top 40
D- Top 100
E- Top 200
F- A mole hill

4. He rose to the level of:

A- The best pitcher in the game
B- The best pitcher in the league
C- The Cy Young award winner under most conditions
D- A Cy Young award contender under normal conditions
E- A Cy Young award contender under perfect conditions
F- The steering wheel

5. Based on his rate stats, this player would be placed in the:

A- Top 7
B- Top 20
C- Top 40
D- Top 100
E- Top 200
F- Dumpster

6. This player’s black and gray ink totals most closely resemble players who are in the:

A- Top 7
B- Top 20
C- Top 40
D- Top 100
E- Top 200
F- Witness protection program

7. What did this player have to toss in order to get media attention?

A- His garbage (everything he did was news)
B- His lunch (anything nominally interesting was enough)
C- His wife (anything newsworthy)
D- His back (any baseball-related news)
E- A game (something newsworthy on its own within the baseball world)
F- Rocks at the White House (something newsworthy on its own)

8. How did his closest historical comps fare in the Hall of Fame voting?

A- Got in immediately and threatened the record for voting percentage
B- Got in on their first couple of tries
C- Got in through the BBWAA voting
D- Got in through Veterans’ Committee voting or selection
E- Got mentioned as candidates for selection by the Veterans’ Committee
F- Got milk?

9. When Ken Burns’ descendants write the history of baseball in 2100, he will get his own:

A- Chapter
B- Chapter section
C- Page
D- Paragraph
E- Sentence
F- Copy

10. If this player is not considered to be qualified for the Hall of Fame, it would mean that the Hall of Fame is:

A- Pointless
B- Deluded
C- Exclusive
D- Behind
E- Discerning
F- In Cooperstown, New York

Conclusion (add ‘em up and divide by 10) –

When he arrives at the Hall of Fame entrance, the doorman will send him to the:

A- Penthouse
B- VIP suite
C- Gallery
D- Lobby
E- Line
F- Ticket window

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